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Saturday, January 31, 2009

♥ Serietà, Incertezza e Felicita.

Questo anno sta risultando essere differente anche. And it's only Gennario! I can't say I'm not happy about it, though. I'm realizing things now that I've never even thought about before. I'm more comfortable with my surroundings. I can say I can honestly express myself more now than last year. I don't know what changed, and when exactly it happened. But I'm glad it did happen.

I never did realize I had friends in college. Stupido, sì? I go with them because I didn't want to go anywhere alone. And even though I am with them all the time, I didn't know much about them and they didn't know anything about me. It was as if I was there, but out of the loop. And though it bothered me, I never did anything about it. I never thought I have to.

But things are different now. I share my thoughts more now, and I hear theirs. Although, it's not as if I share everything. There are still some things I can't say. But this is a definite improvement. And I like it. I can say I have my college friends now: friends I go out with, have fun with, joke with, gossip with, complain with, share advices with, confide with... E sono felice. People who I can't approach before seems so friendly now. I still have some issues with myself and other people and topics, and not everyday is a blast, but this has been undoubtedly my happiest time this college.

Aaaand... he seriously has feelings for me, well, it's what he said. And I don't know what to believe. It's may be a little cruel of me, not to trust what he said. And it's not as if he said he loves me (I didn't ask, I was afraid of the answer). And... I seriously don't know what to do. He told me he can't read me, and he's asking for any kind of response. But I don't know what to give him. I'm beggining to hate myself for not knowing, because I think that I do know, I just don't want to acknowledge it. I want us to be friends. That, I'm sure of. Maybe, it's all I want. And I'm confusing all these feelings because of who surrounds me. But that aside, I still don't know what to tell him. He's expecting it soon.

I'm sooooo dead.

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11:57:00 AM

♥ The Grumpy Toast ♥

    The Grumpy Toast is very grumpy. Beware, this toast bites.

♥ Lies ♥

    I'm sorry.
    Everything's gonna be okay.
    Love makes the world go round.

♥ Horoscopes ♥

    And if you can't feel confident, then just fake it until you do! If you can convince yourself of your value, then other people will be convinced of it, too.
    You have some serious strength that you still haven't tapped into, and today's challenges will finally give you a chance to discover it for yourself.
    Stop chasing and let yourself be chased.
    There is no time like the present to get started on your future!
    You should be more deliberate about figuring out where you want to go, what you want to do, and who you want to do it with.
    Because if you show the people in power that you are not only out for yourself, you can make a very good impression.
    You simply cannot afford to let popular opinion shape even a single one of your decisions -- it may seem harmless to do something just to make everyone else happy, but in the end it will put you in uncomfortable, false situations. Being popular is not worth sacrificing your independent thinking or your goals. So do what you want to do -- push as hard as you want and ignore what other people think. You have to stay true to your idealistic nature.

♥ TagBoard ♥

    The toast said TAG. NOT spam.

♥ Thank you ♥

    A grumpy thanks to
  • Jasmine
  • for creating the grumpiest layout The Grumpy Toast has ever seen. Kudos!
    the toast's head
    for having the ability to write things that The Grumpy Toast wants to write and blessedly, in an understandable way.
    for giving the toast reasons to be grumpy so the toast can write on the toast's blog.
    The Grumpy Toast's friends
    for making the toast's life everyday grumpy (weeee).
    for reading The Grumpy Toast's blog even though it's full of grumpy nothings about the toast's life.

♥ Past Rawr-ing ♥